Okay, so above teenage boy comes to me the other day and says he has been invited to a birthday party. (I'm thinking, oh great, now I have to shell out 20 bucks for this b-day child). Then he tells me its a sleep over. I'm like...do I know him...do I know his parents...where does he live...? Please note, AJ goes to Elmwood High. There is great cause for concern.
Then he tells me the party is for Michelle. So I answer back, "unless Michel is a french boy on exchange from Quebec, my answer is no". He informed me that Michelle is indeed a girl and that she is having a sleep over for both boys and girls.
I'm pretty sure I watched this on Oprah. A whole hour on the Co-ed Sleepover. What is this about? Sleepovers are for painting nails, peircing body parts, sharing deep secrets and passing gas at will(remember 13th birthday, Niverville girls?). Not to mention impromptu exorcisms and dance contests. Why would anyone want to mess with that? Boys at a sleepover?? So wrong on so many levels.
Fortunately, Aj did not argue this, but saw the look on my face that told him, this subject is not open for discussion. I told him that my job is to not allow him to enter situations that he is not emotionally mature enough for. He was okay with that and I told him we would take him to a movie instead. He could even bring a friend, as long as its a male friend!!
But I do feel for Michelle. Never met her, but it seems like her mom is more willing to keep the peace and give in to her daughter than to teach her to respect herself. Its okay to say NO. Sometimes its the best way to say I LOVE YOU.....
I love you AJ.. mwa
xoxoxo
6 comments:
I'm with you on this one Jo. Not a chance Lance! A 13 year old girl having a co-ed sleepover?? I've been 13 and I know what happens in those types of situations. What the hell is her mother thinking. Is she passing out condoms at the door? I'm sorry, but I think one is only asking for trouble encouraging a party like this.
AJ is much better off going to the movies with Mama Bear.
I love the explanation that you gave him about being emotionally mature enough...good job Joanne!
Yay Jo! Omigosh, my offspring was in that siutation once too, our answer was the same as yours, although not as eloquent. Believe it went something like "because I said so!".
Poor Michelle indeed, wonder how she feels knowing her mom would rather let her do whatever she wants rather than pay attention and truly parent her. There is no way her mom is naive enough to think they were going to play pin-the-tail-on-the-donkey or tag all night, is there?
Re: teenage boy hygeine... my A's pants stand up on their OWN they are so dirty before he lets me wash them... *sigh* perhaps its not such a bad thing that they smell? Keeps the girls away I've heard.
I can't believe we are at the point where we have chilren who are this age! (I still have a few years before CJ is asking to sleep with boys...) But my goodness! Co-ed sleepovers? Lord have mercy! My advice is, say NO! But make sure you sleep in front of his bedroom door the night of the party. He is half "Enns" he will be able to sneak his way out of any house if he wants to. It might be a good idea to have Jamie sleep in a tree in the front yard.
The 13th birthday party with the impromptu exorcism seems like just yesterday... It's been 20 years! Where is the time going! Before you know it, AJ will be moving out and getting married, if he's like you, that's in about 7 years! Take him to a movie, perhaps Charlotte's Web, insist he sit on one of those toddler booster seats that they give you at the theatre, and refuse to accept that he's growing up!! If you follow our mothers' leads, now would be about the point where you stick your head in the sand for the next 10 years!!
It is so tempting to do just that.. Turn a blind eye and plead ignorance. But I believe that all the narrow escapes we had as teens were lessons for me to learn so I could be a well informed parent. To wander around in oblivion goes against my "know it all" attitude anyway!!
Oh Jo...read this and just had to comment....and I laughed...sorry....but it is sooo hard for me to realize you guys are all grown up with kids of your own...was it not just a few years ago that you and Brand came home in the middle of the night with teeth missing and broken noses??? God bless you Jo for standing strong....co-ed sleepover?? That is beyond rediculous.... but yes, I think a guard at the bedroom window might be in order...unless he sleeps upstairs then your good to go...love reading your blog....Lindalew
You are such a good mom! I hope I can be as strong as you when these decisions come up. In this case it just seems like a no brainer-13 year old boys and girls at the same sleep over-you've got to be kidding me! Hopefully we have learned from some of our own mistakes and our kids can benefit from them.
Jenn-I loved your comments about where Jamie should sleep. Practicing coming in and out of the window comes to mind.
and the 20 years thing-there's no need to do the math.
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